Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Birthday Behind Bars

So, today I celebrated the big 3-0...in prison! (If you have no friggin' clue what I'm taking about, check out my earlier entry about my time in prison, here.) Needless to say, I will definitely remember this birthday for many years to come.

Jay and I spent the day strolling around Napier, snapping pics of the Art Deco buildings and all the street signs with author's names (of which there were many).















We stopped for lunch at our favourite sushi place...and then onto our favourite cafe, Cappadonna, for birthday cheesecake!


Waiting to dig into some sushi, sporting my birthday gifts from Jay (a Ramones hoodie and a lovely tiki necklace made from New Zealand jade, aka "greenstone." Thank you, Jay. : )



Some time ago, I joked about how, for my 30th birthday, it would be cool to have a proper party with party games and hats (you know, just to to show how un-30ish I am). Later in the evening, we were all sitting around the TV room when someone flicked the lights off. Then, lo and behold, Liesil whipped out the party hats (even managing to get one on Basil!) and everyone started singing as Sheree came through the door with a cake full of candles - so many that I was starting to get a bit overheated! You know you're getting old when your birthday cake makes you sweat more than sitting in the dentist's chair waiting for a root canal (which I've never had, but I can imagine it would be quite the sweat-inducing procedure).



Tomorrow, sadly, Jay and I are leaving the prison...but for good reason. I have a job interview in Auckland on the 21st (but more on that later)!

When we came to Napier Prison back in March, we were asked to stay for three weeks...but we loved our time here so much we ended up staying for almost four months! It would take ages to write about every little thing we've seen and done since we've been here, so instead, here are a few highlights:

Ringin' in the Roaring Thirties with my Prison Family! The evening before my birthday, we got all the prison gang together (those of us who were still around, anyway) and went for dinner at one of our favourite restaurants, a delicious Turkish place called Kilim. (The people who work there are super nice and ever since one of the employees found out we're Canadian, he asks us about Vancouver almost every time we go in, haha...he seems a bit obsessed with the place. This guy has also given us free Turkish delight and baklava on occasion, so he's ace with us!) It was indeed a very international birthday dinner.


From left: English John, Irish Joe, Jay, Me, Tomas and Nacho (the Chileans), Sheree and Grace (the Kiwis), Liesil and Steve (the Americans), and Swedish Ylva. 


Discovering Hell Pizza. Hell, I guess you could say, is the "hottest" pizza joint around. Hell is a New Zealand-based pizza chain (with a location, I just found out, in Vancouver, BC...wooooo!) with sinfully delicious food. Their standard pizzas are named after the Seven Deadly Sins (Lust, Greed, Envy, Wrath, Pride, Sloth and Gluttony...with cheese!) while other pizzas have names like "Mordor" - a nod to Lord of the Rings and my personal favourite. Hell has the coolest marketing and the pizza boxes even fold into lil' cardboard coffins for you to stash your leftovers! Eating in Hell while living at prison, close to Cape Kidnappers. There's something wrong with that, idden dere?


Hell Pizza box!




Check out Saddam Hussein, Muammar Gaddafi and Osama bin Laden on the front window. 


Fun and Games. Just because we're "inmates" doesn't mean we don't have a good time. Sometimes we played Cops and Robbers (how fitting!) at night around the prison's dark grounds. Sheree always had something up her sleeve, like the "Prison Olympics," where she made us play catch with water balloons; Fluffy Bunny with pink and white marshmallows (which seem to be the only colour of marshmallows you'll find here in NZ); eat melted Snickers bars from diapers (which looked gross but tasted delicious); and more - sometimes, I think, for her own twisted entertainment! Sometimes, we managed to bust out of the prison for a bit of fun. Every Thursday evening, we would all go to the "Cri," located in Napier's largest Spanish Mission/Art Deco style building, for the weekly pub quiz. Some of us went for the booze, others for the free squid rings, fries and fish, and others just because we like trivia. Whatever the reason, we always had a great time - and a couple of times, we even managed to snag the bar tab.




















The Thursday pub quiz crew, looking very intense (from left): Greg (a random dude who floats from team to team each week); Irish Joe; Jay; Me; and German Stef. Photo courtesy of Stef G.


Much More Music! Not too long after I arrived in prison, I started getting into the ukulele (Sheree is mostly responsible for this, as she always seems to be toting one around and we sometimes had lil' jam sessions in the office). So in April, toting bags full of groceries, I caved and popped into the Music Machine and finally bought one. A nice bloke from Liverpool helped me out, and sold me the uke and a hardshell case for a few bucks off. Besides sounding pretty, the uke is also a nice souvenir from New Zealand, as it's decorated with the country's flag.




The tuning pegs are connected to lil' dolphins on back...Awwwww : )


Discovering the Kiwi Touton. One day, Jay was chatting with Sheree when she started describing a type of Maori fried bread that you could buy at the Sunday market just down the street. Jay, thinking it sounded strangely similar to a touton, went down to check it out and lo and behold, there it was!




All the Cuddly Critters. Sometimes, the prison felt like a zoo of sorts. While Basil is the "top cat" around here, Marion's adorable dog, Finn, often tried to steal the spotlight.








Oh Basil!


Hanging Out on the Marine Parade. The Marine Parade is probably one of Napier's most beautiful features. There is a paved path running right alongside the ocean that Jay and I used to run on every second morning. Around here you'll also find the Pania of the Reef statue, which is apparently "one of the most photographed tourism attractions in the country.







The Saturday Farmer's Market in Clive Square. Clive Square has a beautiful park, which includes an automated set of chimes, shaped like a harp, that plays the most beautiful music throughout the day.






Creepy Days and Spooky Nights. Living at a supposedly haunted prison, you know there's lots of spooktacular fun to be had. One night, we even had a team of local paranormal investigators camp out at the prison. We followed them around a while as they investigated the hanging yard and other supposedly haunted hot spots with all their high-tech gear in tow. On a few occasions, we were asked to help out with the nighttime ghost audio tours. A handful of us dressed up in scary garb and hid in the cells and hallways throughout the prison, in the pitch black, waiting to jump out at unsuspecting tourists. It was good fun while it lasted and a couple of visitors were so freaked out they never even made it into the prison proper - so we must've done a good job!


Calum the Scot, scary Sheree, creepy Cat and me (in the white dress with glowing eyes) wait to terrorize unsuspecting tourists! 


Jay, looking all demented, as usual, hehe....


As I said before, I could ramble on about my time in prison (that never ceases to sound funny to me) for ages...but I'll stop here and just say it's been awesome - and the main reason for that is my fellow inmates aka, my prison family. Thanks for making this adventure so much fun, and I hope we all cross paths again!




















From left: Jay, Me, English Cat, German Stef, Little Nacho (the Chilean), Minnesota Bill, Big Nacho and Tomas (the other Chileans), and Steve and Liesil the Americans.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Welcome to Waiheke


So, on May 26 we busted out of prison for a week...and what an awesome week it was! 

After eating quick breakfast sammies on the bench outside the Mess Hall, we strapped on our big ass backpacks and headed down the hill to catch the Naked Bus. (And yes, we were fully clothed - get your minds out of the gutter!) The Naked Bus is so named because their slogan is "Stripping the cost of travel"...get it? Alright, now that we've cleared that up...

After a roughly eight-hour drive, we arrived in Auckland and had a pretty relaxing evening. We went out and wasted a bunch of coins at the arcade and then checked out Men in Black 3, which was pretty good actually. 

The next day (Sunday) we found out that our good prison buddy, Minnesota Bill, was also in Auckland while waiting to fly back home to the good ol' U S of A. (Bill left the prison in early April, and Napier not too long after, so we were pretty jazzed about seeing him again.) After a few texts back and forth, he met up with us just outside our hostel. Unfortunately, Bill had hurt his knee while at work and was hobbling around a bit, so we couldn't go very far - but we didn't care. We were just glad to be able to hang out with him again before he left for home. I christened him "Bum Knee Bill" and the name stuck like glue for the rest of the week (aren't I a good friend?). 


After grabbing a drink together, Jay and I said see ya later and went to the ASB Theatre to see Riverdance "The Farewell Tour." I saw Lord of the Dance years back and loved it (I can't get enough of the Irish dancing!), so when I found out that Riverdance was going to be in Auckland when we were there (and the last tour no less), I had to buy a ticket. I think the man near the first row who was jumping out of his seat and clapping and cheering, however, was just as entertaining as the dancers! 

The next day (Monday) was one that Jay and I had been waiting for for ages (and not because we got to have lunch and hang out with Bill again, though that was pretty awesome as well!). Back when we were in Newfoundland and contemplating whether to go to New Zealand this year or hold off for a bit longer, we heard that Florence + The Machine (one of our favourite artists) was going on tour and would be heading Down Under in the spring (fall in NZ). Once we had decided to head to NZ, we bought tickets to the concert right away (I joke that finding out that Flo was going to be in New Zealand is the main reason why we decided to go when we did...however, she definitely might've played a bit of a part. : ) 

I don't know if there's any words that'll justify how awesome it was to see Florence live. When someone sounds as good (or better) live than they do on their album, you know they've really got talent - and Florence has it bleeding out of her. She sang her guts out like an angel on fire, prancing around the stage barefoot in flowing black robes like a fairy. (Is there something wrong with me that I kinda wish she were my lil' cousin? : ) 





Anyway, instead of rambling on about how awesome Florence and the band were, here are some videos of them in action. (Click to watch.)

What the Water Gave Me




Dog Days Are Over


Dog Days continued w/crowd



The next morning (Tuesday, the 29th), Jay and I made our way to beautiful Waiheke Island in the Hauraki Gulf - just a 35 minute ferry ride from downtown Auckland. This part probably deserves a bit of background.

So, earlier in May, the editor of Downhome forwarded me along an email from a guy named Peter Russell. Basically, Peter is a Downhome subscriber and follows my blog, so he knew I was living Down Under for the year. In the email, Peter explained that he was an expat Newfie who has been living in New Zealand for the past eight years. He also said that he manages a motel on Waiheke and invited me over to visit for a couple of days. So, since Jay and I were headed to Auckland for the concert, we figured what better time than now to take Peter up on his offer? And before we knew it, boom - we were on the boat heading over. 

Buh bye Auckland! 

*Sidenote: If you're interested in finding out how Peter ended up on Waiheke, you can check out this article that I wrote for Downhome here (PDF).

After we hopped off the ferry, we walked a few minutes into town to catch the bus over to Onetangi, the section of the island where Peter lives and where his motel, Onetangi Beach Apartments (OBA), is located. All it took from me was a quick "Helloooo" for the receptionist to know who I was. "Ah, you must be Linda," she says and with that, out pops Peter. We shook hands and had a chat and then he showed us to our apartment - quite the step up from our lil' cell at the prison! 


As is turns out, Peter is originally from Blaketown, which is just a 40 minute drive from my hometown. Within just a few minutes, we also found out that we have friends in common back home - it really is a small world! 

After Jay and I stashed our stuff and settled in, we ran over to Onetangi Beach, which is just across the road from the apartments and is Waiheke's longest beach. The two kilometre stretch of white sand is considered by many to be one of the most beautiful beaches in New Zealand. As soon as we step foot on it, we can see why. 






After a quick stroll on the sand we headed back over to our apartment where Peter picked us up for a "tiki tour" of the island. It was awesome having our very own personal tour guide! After stopping by the harbour to check out his dad's boat (proudly named "Trinity Bay" in honour of his home in Newfoundland), Peter drove us all around Waiheke's vineyards (they don't call this place the "Island of Wine" for nothing!). 


Along the way, we stopped in for a wine tasting at Mudbrick Vineyard & Restaurant, where Peter used to work as head chef (and where he met his wife). The wine, needless to say, was awesome - so much so that we didn't think too hard about dropping a fair chunk of change on one of the vineyard's nicest reds (and hey, we figured since we didn't have to pay for the tasting, or for a place to stay, why not splurge a little?). 

Mudbrick vineyard

Scenery around Mudbrick

Tasty, tasty wine!

On the way back, Peter brought us to the grocery store where we stocked up on olives, cheese and bread - the perfect foods for enjoying that bottle to the very last drop! After a quick stop by his house to meet his lovely wife Tanya, Peter brought us back to our pad for the next couple of days, where we hung out on the deck and breathed back the fresh, ocean air. 

That evening, Peter took us out to dinner to Charlie Farley's, a restaurant (located just a hop, skip and a jump away from the beach apartments) named after Tanya's grandfather that Peter and a friend opened in 2007. (Peter has since left the business to focus on running OBA.) We enjoyed a good ol' Kiwi/Newfie family dinner, complete with Peter's wife and their two little girls (Grace, 4, and Aurora, almost 1), his in-laws Phil and Gailene, and sister-in-law Stacey (who are some of the nicest people you will ever meet)...along with lots and lots of wine! The waitress seemed pretty excited to meet us as well, exclaiming, "It's the Newfies!" and saying that she had heard all about us (as if we were something special, haha). 

The Kiwi/Newfie gang! From left: Stacey, Grace, Jay, Me, Gailene, Tanya, Aurora and Peter. Phil played photographer on this one. 

After I drank 'till I thought I couldn't drink anymore (albeit, I am a bit of a lightweight), we all went back to Phil and Gailene's house, just up the road, where Phil kept pouring us glass after glass of port and other assorted liqueur. Phil, as we say in Newfoundland, is a bit of a case and is a real salt of the earth kinda guy (as I said in my article, picture a cross between the Crocodile Hunter and Captain High Liner and you get the idea. Phil even throws the occasional "CRIKEY!" into conversations when he gets excited...which is pretty frequently). As we slammed back the port, Phil showed us a video of him out in his boat feeding a bunch of sharks and petting them as if they were puppies (crazy guy!). Once everything had dried up, Peter brought us back to the apartments, where I passed out in a liqueur-dazed sleep...and it was one of the best sleeps I've had in a while. 

The next day, after a nice, light lunch, Peter and a barefoot Phil (in true Kiwi style) collected us for our fishing adventure! Phil is a boat-builder by trade and used to be a commercial fisherman before starting his own business, Adventure Fishing Charters. You could say saltwater runs through his veins and he's obviously very passionate about his work. After Peter told him that I get seasick and that Jay's a vegetarian, however, I think Phil thought that the fishing trip would be a bust...but we had such an awesome time - definitely one of the highlights of our trip to New Zealand so far!

After launching us out into the open water by the ferry terminal, Phil hopped aboard, slipping into what he calls his "safety shoes" (which are actually mismatched flip-flops, haha). 


We circled the entire island as Phil pointed out some of its unique features and shared stories of its history. 

One of Waiheke's million-dollar properties. 

At one point, Phil (being the case he is) revved up the boat's engine and sent us flying straight towards some jagged rocks that were jutting out of the water. As I was getting ready to kiss my bum goodbye, he pulled a quick left turn at the last minute and expertly maneuvered us straight through an opening in between the rocks that he knew was there (but we surely didn't!). Shortly after, we also had an up close and personal encounter with some sea caves, which was very cool. I imagine that no fishing trip with Phil could ever be dull!

After finding a good spot to cast our lines, Phil baited our hooks and showed us the proper techniques. I was probably around 10 or so the last time I went fishing, so to say my technique was a bit rusty would be a bit of an understatement. But with the ever-enthusiatic (and patient) Phil guiding us, we were catching snappers like pros in no time. Jay actually caught the first fish, which was a fair size; but the one I caught not too long after blew his right out of the water, so to speak. Waiting for those fish to take the bait and feeling the tug on the line was one of the most thrilling parts of the day! (I can definitely understand how sport fisherman get such a rise out of this.) By the end of it, Jay had caught four fish and I caught three - not too shabby for a usually green-faced sea goer and a vegetarian, haha. 




On the way back to shore, we noticed something splashing in the water just up ahead. As Phil turned off the engine  and we stood there, gently bobbing up and down, the theme music from "Jaws" started playing in my mind as all manner of horrifying thoughts crept in. Daaa Duh...Daaa Duh...DaDuhDaDuhDaDuhDaDuhDa...HOLY CRAP, ORCAS! While killer whales do visit Newfoundland from time to time, I've never actually seen one in real life - so to see a whole pod before me, playing right beside and underneath the boat, was incredible. (Speaking of which, have any of you ever seen the wonderfully awful "Orca: The Killer Whale," starring Bo Derek and filmed in none other than Petty Harbour, Newfoundland in the '70s? Do yourselves a delightful disservice and check it out.) Phil (who said he's never seen so many whales in one spot, acting in such a way) was just as excited as we were And, as if the moment couldn't handle any more awesome, as soon as the orcas came out to play, a rainbow appeared above them. The only thing that could've topped that was if Santa flew down from the sky riding a unicorn whilst blowing bubbles....or something like that anyway. (Click the image below to see the video.) 



Once the whales grew tired of us, Phil fired up the engine again and it was homeward bound. As he cleaned the day's catch, a gorgeous sunset played out before us, the deep hues of orange and red dancing off the water with the boats sitting silently in the background. It very much reminded me of home. 

Phil gettin' fishy. 



That evening, everyone (with the exception of Stacey) headed to Peter's house to enjoy the fruits (or I guess I should say, the fish) of our labour. The smell of fresh fish wafted throughout the house as Newfoundland musicians Sherman Downey and Graham Wells (Peter has quite a few Newfie CDs in his collection) provided the soundtrack. I definitely felt like I was back home! For dessert, Tanya (who happens to be a pastry chef, and a very talented one at that) made pavlova, which is a mouthwatering, meringue-based treat. Pavlova is a somewhat contentious point between Kiwis and Aussies, as each fight to hold claim to the famous dessert. Whoever invented it, it's freakin' delicious. Tanya topped hers with golden kiwi and little juicy passionfruit - a perfectly sweet way to cap off the perfect day.  


After Jay and I had seconds (and p'raps thirds) of the pavlova, we chatted the evening away. I could just sit and listen to the Kiwi accent all day long. "Hello Tigha," Phil cooed to his little granddaughter as he bounced her on his knee. It's obvious that Phil's love for his family, and the seafaring way of life, run as deep as the ocean itself. "You don't take anymore than what you need and make sure there's lots left for people like her," he says, smiling at Grace.

After Phil and Gailene left, Peter, Tanya, Jay and I continued chatting over tea. Around 11 or so, Jay and I had a nice, quiet stroll back down to the beach apartments. Like last night, it didn't take long for the Sandman to come. Something about the salty sea air just does that to you. 

The next morning, Peter visited us at our apartment where we had another nice chat over a cup of tea and I got some more information for my Downhome story. Later that afternoon, after Jay and I managed to haul ourselves away from the beach, Peter gave us a lift back to the ferry. In true Newfie fashion, handshakes turned into hugs and it felt more like we were saying goodbye to a long-lost cousin rather than a guy we just met a couple of days ago. Peter and his whole family treated us like we were the King and Queen of England (or something to that affect), but more importantly, they made us feel so at home when we were so very far away - and that's something that I'll always remember. 

As we sailed back to Auckland, a rainbow spread across the sky - a fitting end to our two days on an island paradise. 

Once we got back to the hustle and bustle of the city, we booked a room at BASE, the same hostel Bill was staying at, so that we could all hang out together. Later, Bill (who was sporting a pair of crutches at this point) came to our room and we sat down and looked through our pictures and video of Waiheke. That evening, we shared a meal, and some more drinks together, before chilling out in the hostel's lounge. 

Early Friday morning, it was back on the Naked Bus - but not before having breakfast with Bill at Ronnie's Cafe. Again, we gave each other big hugs and said goodbye. I'm sure we'll see ol' Bum Knee again in the future...and hopefully then, his bum knee won't be any more. 

Everyone was pretty happy to see us again back at the prison. You would've thought we were gone a month or something. And even though our time with Peter and his family (and the beach!) was awesome, I was happy to see them too -  especially Basil!

That night, we all went out to the Rose, an Irish bar (there are quite a few of them here in NZ) for a proper sendoff for Tilman, our latest German inmate. There was a Kiwi guy there who kept buying drinks for everyone. He told us that he works in construction and, knowing that backpackers are often pinched for cash, likes to buy them drinks whenever they're around. Nice guy. So, a Newfie, a Kiwi and a German walk into a bar (sounds like the perfect setup for a corny joke), and...this happened!

The kind Kiwi (middle) helps me to defeat the German!

*A huge, heartfelt thanks again to Peter and Tanya Russell and Phil and Gailene Scott for taking such good care of us! If any of you guys ever find yourselves on Waiheke, do yourselves a favour and check out Onetangi Beach Apartments and Adventure Fishing Charters. You won't be disappointed. (I don't want this to come across as shameless promotion - these guys really do run a tight and top-notch ship!)